We’re all very good at sabotaging ourselves. You know the kind of thing: “I can’t do that” or “That was a disaster.”
However, there are some simple and powerful phrases that can help us overcome these self-doubts.
It doesn’t matter whether you’re a singer or a choir leader; whether you’ve been doing it for 25 years or 25 minutes. It’s common to think we’re rubbish, or we’ve failed, or we’re just not up to the job.
Instead of allowing these negative thoughts to get the better of us, here are some magic words and phrases that can help.
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“even though …” – use this when fear or
inexperience overwhelm you.
”Even though I’ve never sung in public, I’m well rehearsed, will do my best, and aim to have fun.”
”Even though it’s my first time leading a singing workshop, I’ve prepared thoroughly. I’m really looking forward to it, and I’m sure the singers will be supportive and understanding.”
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“... at the moment” – this phrase is useful
when you feel you’re not up to the task or believe you can’t do something.
”I’ve tried hard, but I can’t hit those high notes at the moment. With a little more practice, I know I’ll get there.”
”I’m finding it impossible to conduct that tricky syncopated part at the moment. I need to spend more time practising at home and I’ll nail it.”
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“what I’ve learned is …” – this phrase is
helpful when you feel that you’ve failed or messed up.
”I got my harmony part completely wrong in our concert. What I’ve learned is that I need to prepare more next time and focus extra hard during that song.”
”I gave the wrong starting notes for one of the songs. It was a disaster. What I’ve learned is to take more time to ensure the starting notes are correct and that the choir and audience won’t mind.”
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“yes” – when you’re starting out, say
“Yes!” to every opportunity that comes your way, even though
you might think it’s not for you. You will gain valuable experience by
exposing yourself to a wide range of situations. You can evaluate these
commitments later and drop those that aren’t serving you.
However, ensure that you’re saying “Yes” for the right reasons.
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“no” – It’s easy to become overloaded by saying
“Yes” to everything out of fear of missing out (especially if you’re
freelance – turning down work is scary!). Saying “No” can earn you
respect as it shows that you’re busy, confident and know your mind. It might
make people want you even more!
Again, make sure you’re saying “No” for the right reasons. Don’t use it as an avoidance tactic or out of fear.
Chris Rowbury
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